Last chance...

Can anyone interested in going to Hearts v Celtic next Sunday (Nov 2) please confirm ASAP, so we can get tickets and travel booked. email yorkhearts@yahoo.co.uk

YHFC "What can I say"

York Hearts were B.. raped at the Roko Stadium by new boys Cube last night!!!!!!!!!! If anyone wishes to know the score then they will have to look on the play football website but rest assured we cannot call ourselves "Black Jacks" any more. Least said about last night the better, but we will bounce back and keep our heads held high next week. If anyone can play in goal, defend, run the midfield, attack or just kick the shit out of people then call Stampy Carroll on 07782162712.

Jambos hit rock bottom

YHFC were stuffed royally 11-4 by Athletico Physio at the Roko Stadium last night. The scoreline rather flattered physio who were by far the better team but were rocked by an under strength Jambos team. Mom Arsey Jono was inspired in goal, Stampy Carroll kicked the living daylights out of anything that moved, Arkroyal Outing used his 432000 tonnes to great effect up front and had a blinder. Badger "Souness" Warner came out of retirement and with Ghandi "Vinny Jones" Anderson and Bedo"he should have brazilian"Beddingham in midfield the young guns must have wished for thicker shin pads.The younger, fitter and more skilled Physio were pegged back by the Jambos, at times were up against the wall and if it wasn,t for another "diabolical" refereeing decision the game could have been much closer. The Jambos ended the game with their heads held high only for Ibby"don,t F..k with the baldies"Dall to continue the "Respect the referee" campaign and have a "quiet" word with the bungling official.
Just for a change, we had a few beers, and the curry was fantastic!!!!!!!!

Cup Dreams Dashed

York Hearts' open-topped bus parade through the city will have to wait for another year, after the Jambos were knocked out of the cup in the cruellest of fashions tonight.
With a squad stripped to its bare bones, the Jambos fought out a 0-0 draw with Elegant Homes, before being edged out 6-5 in a tense penalty shoot-out.
Elegant Homes had the better of the game but neither side made many clear-cut chances, with Hearts' stand-in keeper Gav Aitchison only having to look lively once at point blank range. At the other end, Sam Outing came close with a few efforts but could not find the target.
And so to penalties. Both sides scored their first, missed their second, and then scored their next four. When Elegant Homes found the net again with their seventh penalty, the pressure was on but loan-signing Andy Rayner fired over.
The Hearts squad was: Aitchison, Carroll, Hardie, Beattie, Rayner, Outing.

YHFC "Ran 10k, had a few beers and a curry"

Members and associates of York Hearts ran 10 kilometers yesterday to raise money for cancer research. Doesn,t sound much you might be thinking to yourselves but when you think of the amount of alchohol and curry,s consumed by most of them and that very few run anywhere other than to the pub when it,s raining, it was a HUGE achievement by them all.
First passed the post "out for a wee jog" after running last weekends Great North Run, was Liz Simpson, followed by Alex "Bedo" Beddingham a short distance back. Another 50 yards back to the first of the "Old Gits" with Rich "Arsey" Johnson and Brian "Ibby" Dall taking the over 40,s title together. Next over the finnish line was, HQ, sorry White Horse Landlord Dan "Late Taste" Murphy, followed by Steve "Stampy" Carroll, Gav "Ghandi" Anderson, Ian " Badger" Warner, Kev "Batman" Jones and Rachel Harvey who all finnished in a very creditable "Less Than An Hour" Barclay "Dont F... With Me" Ong on his 20th birthday and with NO training at all was next with Jill "Alan Hansen" Anderson, Nick "Nick, Nick" Nicholson doing a storming 1hour 15 minute with a broken coller bone, and finally Kathryn Simpson who came home to rapturous applause from the York Jambos.
A very big hand to all of you for training so hard and putting in such an effort on Sunday. It was a BITCH of a course and you should all pat yourselves on the back (if you dont ache too much) for what we all achieved .
YHFC expect to reach around £2500.00 in sponsorship from the event and would like to thank everyone who contributed. Big thanks to Brigantes, The White Horse and Leeds Brewery for their support.
Everyone piled back to The Horse for food (thanks again Dan and Rachel) and the odd beer or 11.!!!! Oh and then we hit Bombay Spice for a well deserved curry and a few more beers.!! What the hell "WE DESERVED IT"

YHFC "Railroaded" by a shite ref

York Hearts FC were outragously robbed by a consistantly poor, no Diabolical referee at the Roko Stadium last night. The Jambos turned on the style and deservedly took an early lead stunning their opponants into kicking shit out of us. Some early brilliant saves from Arsey Jono kept the Jambos in the game until the decision that rocked the Roko to its foundations. Clever forward play took Network rail through on goal and this time they outfoxed Jono with a clever flick over him ( which is no mean feat, even when he is lying down) towards the empty net. He lept up and launched himself towards the ball with no thought of danger to himself and cleared the ball off the line in the nick of time. The NUMPTY ref blew for a goal to the utter disbelief of the shellshocked Jambos. 3-2 down at half time and it was difficult to rouse the troops but they started the second half brilliantly equalising and giving Network Rail something to think about. An all round great performance was tarnished late on when tired legs and minds allowed 4 late goals to squeeze past a Neville Southall esk Rich Jono. Kermit, Batman and Bedo were the goal scorers and Rich was MOM.

Forfiet of wearing shorts flipflops and sock was well supported, 3 failures but head and shoulders above all was the Ninja, check the photo to appreciate!!!!!!!!

Viceroy "Nan too hot" last night

YHFC played one of there best games last night against Viceroy at the Roko Stadium.Going 1-0 down to a sloppy early goal spurred the Jambos on to get stuck in to their more skillfull and fitter opposition. Hard work and plenty of skill had the Jambos 2-1 up and Viceroy rattled Kermit Outing scoring both. Then a mad 5 minutes before half time saw Viceroy grab an undeserved 4-2 lead. A fluke goal in the first 5 mins, Arsey Johnson missed the flight of a poorly hit shot got the Jambos fighting, and what a fight!! Slick passing great movement (not just after the curry) and some high calibre shooting got the Jambos back in the match, Bedo (he should have been Brazilian) scoring a screamer (Mia,s coaching there). Kermit then beautifully controlled (I know, Kermit and controlled in the same sentence seems wrong) a stunning pass from Ibby (I know Ibby and pass, same sentence bla bla) to drill the ball home to get back to 6-5. Tired legs got the better later and in ended 7-5 but the Jambos held their heads high in defeat. Ibby was MOM.
Pub, beer, the usual, forfiet was completed by most wearing retro footie shirts, next week the Jambos will be seen in the White Horse wearing shorts, flipflops or sandals and socks.
The curry was fantastic!!!!!!!!!!!

YHFC "Had a few beers and a curry"

YHFC got royaly stuffed 15-4 by Stillington at the Roko Stafium last night. At times the Jambos played some entertaining football with MOM Sammy Outing scoring all 4 goals. Midway through the second half Stillington seemed to be tireing but unfortunately that was just wishfull thinking on our part. Anyway on to more important things, back at the Horse it was "suited and booted night" with the Jambos looking completely out of place not being in their casuals. Only one non complier in Calum"I dont own a suit"Beattie and one non shower in MOM Sam "I,ll be there later" Outing. We will collect the fines next week.
Curry!!!! We hit Bombay Spice for a well deserved curry and boy was it hot, (ask Stampy Carroll) who also upset Batman Jones when he told him we used to be a good side. When Kev asked when, was told "before you started playing". Good job Kev was half way down a bottle of wine and had taken all his aggresion out on Stillington or we may have had some injury worries for next week.
Back to footie. The season ended last night and we came a creditable 6th in 7,s Premiership. Another 12 points and 61 goals and we would have pipped Polska for 5th place!!!! Next season eh boys!! Next season starts next week, and after footie we have THE 10K RUN meeting.